Like any parent, when asked which furry little one I like best, I respond with “All of them” or “They’re each special in their own way” but the truth is that some of our critters get more attention than others. Take the little calico pirate, Siena. Every morning when I get dressed for work, Siena bounds into my closet, flops at my feet and plays with my shoelaces until I scoop her up, rub her belly and exclaim, “Of course you’re my favorite favorite!”. It’s a daily bonding ritual, a chance for both of us to confirm our respective awesomeness and create the right mindset for the hard day ahead.
That special relationship soured yesterday morning, when Siena skidded around the corner to the master bathroom on her beeline to the closet, and found Gigi, a chubby Siamese pulled from a downtown parking lot, in my lap, on her back, getting a belly rub and purring. Gigi usually takes her one-on-one time in that part of the bathroom where the occupant is immobile, unlikely to be on the phone and otherwise looking for privacy, but today she hopped up on the counter, presented herself for insincere affirmations and I obliged. And then Siena slid in.
When the shock of the infidelity wore off, Siena initiated an interrogation that would make any Korean mom proud and was galled to discover that “favorite favorite” time was nowhere near as exclusive as the term would suggest. McFlurry, Jean, Potts, Mr. Han, Uncle Creepy and even Harry all confirmed regular, ongoing trysts over a period of months. It didn’t matter that most predated her arrival onsite, others had never even been in my closet or that gender played no role in the intimacy. “Dirty Harry? He…he drools!” She was pissed.
The discovery and ensuing tension was the talk of the buffet for the better part of the day with mouthfuls of kibble punctuated by suggested retribution. “She can reach his suits. That’s where I’d start.” “No, she should pee in his shoes. He won’t notice until it’s too late.” Only Biscuit, the first KF rescue, was unruffled, reacting as she had during the sordid fallout of Tiger Woods’ first car crash—“How is this a surprise to anyone?” She concluded that Siena would recover from the teachable moment and learn to “check her man”, but for now, Siena is choosing the cat tower over my lap and I’m checking my shoes…